Bob Ainsworth met his wife Sue in 1975 which he describes as “love at first sight”. They married in 1982 and since renewed their vows after Sue’s mesothelioma diagnosis.
The diagnosis affected Bob strongly as he thought he would lose Sue within a year, as doctors told Sue that was her expectancy.
“The diagnosis was right at the beginning of Covid, so it was very hard for both of us. We were isolated from the world, and I wasn’t able to go to the hospital to support Sue during treatment, making it harder to deal with,” said Bob.
Sue’s diagnosis
At the start of Covid, Sue noticed swelling on her tummy area and decided to make an appointment with the doctor. The first diagnosis was ovarian cancer, but it soon changed to mesothelioma. The swelling turned out to be fluid build-up and was drained when biopsied.
“I was told I had up to a year to live which was a big shock, I was really afraid,” said Sue.
She was treated in Northampton for approximately three years before receiving private treatment at Glenfield Hospital in Leicestershire, and later from home under the care of Professor Dean Fennell.
“The treatment was hard to manage on occasions but without it and the care of Professor Fennell and the Sciences team, I’m sure things would have been very different. At first diagnosis, I felt very angry and let down.
“I was made redundant before discovering I had cancer. This made me feel as though my life and my future were out of my control.”
Sue received some money, given as compensation by her former employer, before a legal case went to court. This has meant that she’s been able to receive treatment privately.
“The money awarded helped but couldn’t take away the feeling of being robbed of peace of mind, wondering how long I would be here and the things I would miss.
“However, presently, I feel more hopeful and relaxed, receiving the best treatment available to me,” said Sue.
The process of writing the song
After learning about the diagnosis, Bob remembers being at a very low ebb, and frequently breaking down. It was then that he decided to put pen to paper and write down his feelings in the form of a song.
Bob continues: “I was angry and lost for a while and I feel the lyrics reflect this as they are pretty brutal, but I felt it was my feeling going into the song.
“I found writing the song compelling at times and the response when I played it to family and friends was very emotional with a few tears being shed.
“The song is very to the point and may need some editing to avoid distress to other people living with mesothelioma but at the time it was very brutal to me, so the lyrics are honest and a true depiction of what we were going through.”
Raising awareness and bringing the song to life
Bob is now searching for someone to bring his fundraiser song to life.
“I have messaged a couple of singers to record the song including Russell Watson, Alfie Boe, Michael Ball, Elton John, Lionel Richie, and the Pet Shop Boys. Recently I tried contacting Def Leppard to get involved to create a song similar to Bohemian Rhapsody.
“I have a vision for the song to make it epic and reach the charts, raising money as we go.
“Raising awareness for mesothelioma care is incredibly important to me and during my days as a construction lecturer, at many colleges, I taught health and safety to teens mainly before Sue’s illness, but afterwards, it was always the first lesson to any group.”
If you are a singer, musician, or know someone who could help bring Bob’s powerful song to life, please get in touch with Bob at bo*******@********et.com, and be part of raising awareness and vital funds for Mesothelioma UK.
Bob turned to songwriting to help him express his emotions around Sue’s diagnosis. If you are living with mesothelioma or know a family member/friend who is and feel that you need emotional support, reaching out to those who can help and talk to you is very important. There are many sources of support.
If you would like to find out more about support available, call our freephone line on 0800 169 2409 to speak to one of our mesothelioma nurses.
